A couple nights ago I read John chapter 11 in the New Testament, and gained a deeper understanding of the atonement. We know that Christ died for our sins and suffered every pain and affliction that we may encounter on this Earth. One thing that struck me as I read about the death of Lazarus was that Christ experienced the loss of a close friend, just like we do here on Earth. I think I often forget that besides his experience in the Garden of Gethsemane, Christ experienced our pains and sorrows in his daily life. John 11:35 says Jesus wept. Imagine that. The Savior of mankind, the Son of God, Jesus Christ himself, wept. He obviously understood the plan of salvation and the resurrection, but he still mourned at the loss of a friend. In the next verse the Jews declared, Behold how he loved him! Christ understands the pain of losing a loved one. Christ not only knows this pain from the atonement, but from his personal experience. It never ceases to amaze me the different meaning that the scriptures take on at different points of my life. I know that in times of distress, sadness, and pain, the Son of God knows how to succor us because of his experiences.
Today at work was better. Yesterday was a struggle for me as I felt a little overwhelmed, under appreciated, and anxious about my job. This afternoon the topic of conversation at work turned to saving for the future versus spending money now while we can. Wayne, who is also LDS and is married, was talking about the importance of saving for the future. Brad disagreed slightly and then shared with us something form his personal life. His father who had prepared well for retirement, died unexpectedly at the age of 62. Brad said he thinks it is more important to live it up now, because you never know when you will die. Two different opinions, both with good points I felt.
It make me really reflect upon the light that the gospel brings into our lives. While Brad has never mentioned whether or not he is a religious person, my impression is that he was not really raised in a church. I cannot even fathom losing a parent at such a young age, and so unexpectedly. I can understand why he maybe doubts the existence of God. It can be so hard to see the hand of God in our lives when someone so close to us is taken unexpectedly. Without the knowledge of the resurrection and eternal life, I am not sure how I would react to death. It sure would scare me a lot more, not to say that it doesn't a little bit already. Anyway, it made me look at Brad in a different way. Not just as a coworker, but more as a child of God. It made me want to reach out to him a little bit and share with him the plan of our Heavenly Father. I pray that the opportunity arises someday.
Anyway, besides that, not too much more to report on. I seriously am considering different career opportunities though. I realize now, more than ever before how precious life is, and that I do not want to wake up one day realizing that I have not done what I really want to do, and that is to serve others. I don't know how, or where, or when; but I want to find a career of service. People on Earth today are in so much need, and I know that the Lord looks to us to reach out. When that opportunity will arise though, I am not sure though. With Tim gone, I know more now than ever before that there will be people in need of comfort, and that they will be looking for people to turn to. May God grant me the ability to be an instrument in his hands I pray.
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